Dogs are prone to move in — and take over.
Ever since your hooman ancestors — the cave dwellers — pushed aside the huge mastodon skin and invited my ancestors — the huge wolf — into your caves, dogs like me have moved in and taken over. It’s debatable whether those cave dwellers screamed stay off the skins, the equivalent of today’s couch, har har!
It’s a fact, dogs are prone to move in — and take over. When I first went home with Mike, I spied a nice couch with cushy cushions. Soon I was on it and sprawled out. He often had to sit on the floor or in the chair across the room. The home take-over was underway.
Next came a basket for toys, and filling that up. Yes, I made trips to sporting goods stores and went shopping. Today, the basket is overflowing with all kinds of ducks, geese, squirrels and other critters that I often dig through to find the one I want. It’s always the one on the bottom so other toys are tossed aside onto the floor. Hey, this gives Mike something to do: pick them up, har har! I could hear the PA system announcement, “Clean up on the main floor!”
In the grand scheme of taking over are items with my name on those. This ranges from signs to coffee cups to hunting vests. Gotta build my brand, har har!, and keep inching toward total home take over.
Next, in the great take over program, is the closet full of my stuff. In previous columns I have noted I like stuff. OK, Mike has a few items in that closet, and I am slowly inching those out as more and more of my stuff moves in.
Finally comes the best take over level. A lady living near me said it was disgusting that folks let dogs in the house. She will get a lot of growling if she ever steps into my home. Of course she would faint if she knew I not only was in the house and sprawled out on the couch, but when I grew tired of the couch surfing I would run into the bedroom and jump onto the bed. It’s super cushy and that’s where you can find me most nights.
From there I can observe much of my kingdom. So, henceforth understand: I have moved in and taken over, har har! —Cameron
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