Winter fishing — is a terrible idea. Stay home by the fire.
While ice and freezing temperatures have a firm grip on much of America, Mike has decided it’s time to go fishing. He’s not ice fishing and drilling a hole into the ice to then sit and stare into that dark hole, no he’s crawling over ice extending from the river’s bank and plunging into rivers to pursue fish. I think I need to have a doctor examine his brain because the air is frigid cold — and the water is colder.
OK, much of the water is a stark 32.1 degrees Fahrenheit. Just enough to flow, but there are also ice chunks moving downstream with the water. Fish are cold and deep in the bottom of pools. Mike rarely catches any fish when winter fishing, so I again seek a doctor to look at his brain. To make matters worse, he often takes me along. Yikes, it’s cold out, the water is cold and we have a warm fireplace at home that I love to lie beside. Leave me home.
I know, I know, folks go fishing in winter to escape cabin fever. Some folks also pack a bottle of libations to escape problems, like it’s time to file your taxes, har har! Just thought I’d toss that out, so start drinking — I mean winter fishing.
You have to wonder why folks go fishing when ice is everywhere and fish are highly reluctant to bite anything. Then there are boot laces that freeze, boots that freeze onto waders and eyes on a rod that fill up with line-stopping ice. Just the other day Mike’s friend Marlon was fishing and grumbling because ice had clogged nearly all the eyes on his rod and he could not cast — nor retrieve. Hello, it’s 20 degrees out here so what do you expect! Go home, there’s a warm fireplace to sit by.
Anyway, I finally found something to focus on while trudging about in winter, I spotted geese in a nearby field so I plunged into the river, swam across and went dashing after the geese. Suddenly, I realized I was cold, very cold. It’s time to head for the truck and get warm, then head home for that fireplace. When Mike noticed I was shivering, and the snow was again spitting from the sky, I guess he realized I needed attention. I ran way ahead as we headed to the truck, more proof I was cold and winter fishing is all about challenging the cold and nothing about catching fish.
Neither he nor Marlon caught any fish. They could have stayed by the fireplace and saved their gas. Stop fishing in winter, har har! —Cameron
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