As a dog, I have a method of communication that sends a clear message — The Stare.

You hoomans have many ways to communicate — like writing, smoke signals and Morse code. I noticed, nearly all of you rarely speak any more and spend most of each day staring down into a cellphone. Have you quit speaking?

As a dog, I have a method of communication that sends a clear message — The Stare. When I stand and stare, it means Mike needs to do something…NOW. While his training is progressing, sometimes he needs The Stare to get him moving.

For example, just the other morning he served my bowl of breakfast…crunchy plain. Not acceptable. I want that breakfast with chicken broth poured over and delicately mixed with some canned pumpkin puree. Then, it must be warmed for about 15 seconds in the microwave. — Don’t get it too hot!

Mike just sat plain dog food down in my bowl, so he needed The Stare to indicate he had failed to meet my standards and he needed to work and prep my food so I can eat it. Plain dog food is kinda boring. Give me food as interesting as me, har har!

Well, The Stare worked, and after I paused and just stared, Mike added the broth and pumpkin and heated all that in the microwave. Like that girl that broke into the Three Bear’s home and stole porridge from those bears, I like my breakfast just right! Har har!

Anyway, Mike is still learning, but when he fails miserably at the tasks I assign, I can always pause and give The Stare. Then…he knows. —Cameron